Digital Gentlemen

Tags: boys, digital gentlemen, gentlemen, raising boys, raising gentlemen, raising teens, technology and boys, teens and technology

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Raising Boys of Respect in a Time of Technology

The familiar buzz of a cell phone, alerting one of my kids that they have a new text message, is a familiar sound in our busy home. I’m used to it and I know to expect it every day – almost any hour of the day. However, it is still unchartered territory for many parents (myself included) when it comes to lessons on how to teach my boys to be gentlemen in a digital world. There are no lessons I can recall from my own childhood experience, no words of wisdom my parents gave me about cell phones, emails, and webcams. The most extravagant our home got was having a separate children’s line installed so my parents could finally have free reign on their phone (yes – before the options of call-waiting), and computers were fancy typewriters incapable of instantly sending pictures and videos.

Raising Gentlemen

Technology has changed the game when it comes to raising our boys to be gentlemen. As the mom of three boys (four this year with our exchange student), I desperately want to guide these gents to become men of integrity, compassion, and strength, all the while growing into gentlemen. Like so many other parents, however, I am learning that these boys are in the fight of their lives to become true gentlemen. Technology challenges their decisions, their moral compasses, and their hormones. I’ve decided that I can’t throw away the computer, ditch the cell phones, or hide my kids in the basement, which leaves me with only one option: I need to find ways to raise digital gentlemen.

Cell phone etiquette – Most kids don’t actually use their cell phones for talking – they are texting all of the time. There are over 1 billion text messages sent each day, which means we should not be surprised to know that more than 40% of teenagers can text while blindfolded. It is what these kids include in their messages that we need to target.

• Keep the conversation going about respectful texting – just like the birds and bees conversation, this shouldn’t be just a one-time deal.
• Give concrete examples about what might be disrespectful to send in a text message to a young woman. I always tell my boys to remember that at any given time the text message they send to a girl could be read by her father, so always imagine her father reading anything you have to say. It’s a wonder they still text at all with that intimidating image.
• Get to know the acronyms that kids are using in their texting – and make sure they know what they are sending and receiving. I’ve used NetLingo before and it seems fairly accurate (and easy to use).

Pictures and video on demand – Just because your kids can take a picture of themselves and post it for the world to see doesn’t mean they should. Teaching discernment to boys about the differences between appropriate and inappropriate images and videos is a challenge, but even more challenging can be helping them to make wise decisions with the images and videos that are sent to them.

• Redefine privacy for your boys. Make sure they understand that just because they might receive a message doesn’t mean they should send that message on to others or keep it stored on their computer or phone. Not only are there risks of becoming unwittingly involved with child pornography issues (even when a girls sends a flirty picture of herself), but boys are also at risk of contributing to the invasion of privacy of someone else.
• A frightening statistic shows that almost 90% of teens’ flirtatious, racy, and sexually charged pictures (which – as much as we don’t want to admit it, they do take), are found and copied by parasite porn companies and reposted on pornography websites. Make sure your boys understand the risks involved and the dangers (legally, emotionally, etc.) for being any part of this scary trend.

Digital footprints – What kind of digital reputation does your son have? Help him make sure he has an online image that reflects him as a gentleman.

• Know what pictures your son has online, and who is tagging him in their images. Teach him to discern which images to post, and which ones to delete, but most importantly, which ones to never take.
• Make sure your son understands how his comments online can either show him as a respectful young man, or as one who discriminates, demeans, or disrespects women. It can be a challenge for young men to get over the “cool factor” that comes with making attention-grabbing comments, but keep your conversations going with them.

It can be hard enough to wrangle these grass-stained and forever wrestling boys and gather politely at the dinner table. When we add technology into the mix of raising gentlemen, suddenly parenting feels like a steep climb up a mountain, with no protection from the elements or trail guide or GPS. But don’t give up. Keep climbing – our sons need us to be the trail guides.

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/sIdiHEQDQa0/

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Our home is brimming with colorful fall decorations, children dragging in the last of the crunchy fall leaves on their shoes, and you can see the sparkle of excitement for Thanksgiving in their eyes. As the holiday draws closer, I keep wanting to reach out and slow down the clock so that we can enjoy every last bit of the fall season, just as meticulously as my children scrape the bowl for every last bit of leftover frosting. If you want to make the most of the Thanksgiving season with your family, try some of the activities below, use the printable journal paper to spark creativity, and try the easy Thanksgiving Tic-Tac-Toe game that is simple enough for the littlest pilgrims in your house.

Bake Some Thanksgiving Treats Together

• Use the same recipe you use for Christmas cutout cookies, but use turkey shapes or even a cookie cutter in the shape of the letter “T”.
• Put a colorful twist on popcorn with this recipe and teach the following poem to your kids.

The Turkey Shot Out of the Oven

By Jack Prelutsky

The turkey shot out of the oven
and rocketed into the air,
it knocked every plate off the table
and partly demolished a chair.

It ricocheted into a corner
and burst with deafening boom,
then splattered all over the kitchen,
completely obscuring the room.

It stuck to the walls and the windows,
it totally coated the floor,
there was turkey attached to the ceiling,
where there’d never been turkey before.

It blanketed every appliance,
it smeared every saucer and bowl,
there wasn’t a way I could stop it,
that turkey was out of control.

I scraped and I scrubbed with displeasure,
and thought with chagrin as I mopped,
that I’d never again stuff a turkey
with popcorn that hadn’t been popped.

Thanksgiving Printables

Print these Thanksgiving Tic-Tac-Toe cards to use as a pre-dinner game with the younger guests at your Thanksgiving table. Cut apart the words listed at the bottom, fold them, place them in a bag or bowl, and randomly draw out one at a time and call it out like you would a BINGO letter. Players then cover up the picture with a scrap piece of paper, button, or other small object. When you have three in a row, call out Happy Thanksgiving!

• Card 1
• Card 2
• Card 3
• Card 4
• Card 5

Keep little hands busy while you cook by having them make personalized placemats to use during the Thanksgiving meal.

• template 1
• template 2
• template 3

If you’re searching for a Thanksgiving writing lesson idea, try one of these writing prompts for your elementary aged kids. Give them a different page each day and have them add each page to a folder to create a Thanksgiving journal.

• Prompt 1
• Prompt 2
• Prompt 3
• Prompt 4
• Prompt 5

Easy Activities for the Family

• Make a DVD of thankfulness. Encourage your tweens or teens to use the video camera the week before Thanksgiving and go around asking people to either talk about what they are thankful for this Thanksgiving, or go with the trend of “three words” to express their thanks. Put it together as a movie complete with music and play it for entertainment on Thanksgiving.
• Play Thankful Charades – Have everyone in the family take turns acting out something for which they are thankful.

Whatever you do this Thanksgiving season, I hope that you have time for a few fun activities, and lots of time to remember why you are thankful (and some of your favorite foods, too).

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/UakLz4hpm80/

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Parenting teens is tough – but is it a time filled that should be filled with dread, animosity, and trepidation? If you read and believe what is written in “You Don’t Know Anything…! – A Manual for Parenting Your Teenagers” then parenting teenagers is going to be one of the worst times in your life. What is more – your teenagers are going to be mere shadows of kind or respectful human beings. In fact, author Nadir Baksh, Psy. D. and Laurie Murphy, Ph.D. write in their introduction:

There is no need for us to sugarcoat what you have already discovered about your teenagers; they are nothing if not selfish, self-centered, manipulative and ruthless.

I have to admit, this introduction got my attention. I was in some way drawn to this harshness, but I soon realized that I was drawn to it because I was waiting for the punch-line. I waited for the authors to say – hey, teenagers are challenging, but let’s figure out a way to parent them with integrity. Instead I found page after page of criticisms of teenagers. They are painted as entirely different species. While they sometimes do seem like they are living in a different dimension, the type of parenting advice presented in this book frightens me.

What the Book Got Right

Before I trod all over the ideas presented within these pages, there are a few points made by the authors which bear repeating.

• Science has shown that teenage brains are structurally different and therefore not capable of making the same levels of decisions as mature adults. These structures don’t change until people are in their early twenties – around age 23 years.
• Parents need to establish firm boundaries and stick to consequences that they establish for their children.
• Teenagers make mistakes.
• Behavioral charts can work when they are used well with appropriate rewards or consequences.
• Parents need to spend true, real, quality time with their teenagers.
• Parents need to put forth the extra energy to support their teens’ social development – getting them where they need and want to be even though you would really rather sit in your PJs and watch a movie.

Why the Book Scares Me

The more I read into the book, the more I felt the strange sense of pity for the authors. I honestly felt like they harbored such anger and disrespect for teenagers that they must have missed out on what can be wonderful and nurturing relationships for both parents and teenagers. I’ve got three teenagers in my home, one preparing to graduate high school this year, and while I completely agree that these years can be even more difficult for parents than the years spent diapering and toilet training, I just can’t wrap my head around the negativity these authors put on the job of parenting. We should be raising human beings, not fighting against them.

Some ideas presented in this book include:

Advising parents to give veiled threats to their teens, including encouraging them to say, “You do not want to know what will happen if you do not do as I say right now.”

Veiled threats don’t teach teens how to communicate and don’t clearly communicate the consequences that should already be established in your family. Threatening your teenagers only places them on the defensive and places you as adversaries.

Advising parents to prohibit their teenagers from experiencing the responsibility of watching younger siblings or babysitting for others. “Your teenager cannot consistently make good decisions and, moreover, rarely thinks about the consequences of any decision they have made.” The authors say that most teenage babysitters only rifle through drawers, raid refrigerators, and gab on the phone – paying little attention to their charges.

Teenagers are not perfect, but neither are adults. Yes, teens can be less attentive than adults, but teens are also full of potential and energy. I know plenty of teens who care for younger children with more enthusiasm than many adults, and who are wonderful role models for youth.

Accepting the fact that parents don’t like their teenagers. In fact, the authors write, “…here you are, staring into the face of someone who pretends to be your child, and whom you do not like. They may call you Mom and Dad convincingly, yet they cannot possibly be yours…”

What a sad experience to parent teens and not like them. My teens are some of my most favorite people in the world. They are enthusiastic, creative, energized, passionate, and engaged. Yes – some days they make me question my ability to remain sane, but they never make me regret my privilege to parent them.

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/G6Sj9-umFXA/

Printable Science Lessons

Tags: education, free printables, hypothesis, observation, printable, printables, science, science lesson

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Teaching the Basic Steps of Scientific Discovery

Steps to Good Science (printable PDF lesson plan)

Science is all around us, and our children. Whether you are planning for the science fair and need some guidance, you are an elementary teacher, or you are a homeschooling mom like me, helping kids understand the scientific process is an important job. For younger learners the pages of this printable science lesson will help them remember terms and steps, and help them develop strong scientific ideas. This guide can be used to teach the basics of:

• observations
• questions
• hypothesis
• testing and experiments
• drawing conclusions

The pages include a guide for kids to ask questions about their topic, sample Venn diagrams they can print and use, and a sample hypothesis they can use to create their own brilliant idea.

If you need other easy science activities you can do with your kids, try some of these resources for kids, parents, and teachers.

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/DhW2XFXjmU8/

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This morning my teenage son picked up a gun and got ready to leave the house – and I told him to have fun. Have I lost my marbles? I hope not. He was heading out for a morning of deer hunting with his father, something he has done for the past two years. While normally the thought of guns and kids honestly gives me a bit of a stomach twist, I’m trying to allow my kids to take risks – with as much preparation as possible – so that they can actively participate in life.

Risks = Opportunities

An article published in ScienceDaily makes me feel a bit better about sending my children into the world and encouraging them to take risks. Scientists have recently begun to understand more precisely how teenage brains are different from childhood brains and adult brains – and much of it has to do with risk-taking. As parents we know that our teens seem ready to conquer the world, and often times feel invincible (which is also what can worry us so much). But – what if the fact that teenage brains get an extra dose of risk-taking drive gives them more opportunities?

Think about your adult life – we weigh the risks. We consider the options. We might not feel very confident, or we spend way too much time calculating the benefits and the consequences. Then we miss the opportunities. We also might consider this to be mature thinking. It is, especially if we equate mature with adult (in terms of age). Scientists have been able to determine that the brains of teenagers have greater capacities for these functions:

• Increased risk-taking
• Increased sensation seeking
• Increased connectivity

Dr. Giedd, contributing to the literature on teenage brains, says that:

“Adolescence is a time of substantial neurobiological and behavioral change, but the teen brain is not a broken or defective adult brain. The adaptive potential of the overproduction/selective elimination process, increased connectivity and integration of disparate brain functions, changing reward systems and frontal/limbic balance, and the accompanying behaviors of separation from family of origin, increased risk taking, and increased sensation seeking have been highly adaptive in our past and may be so in our future. These changes and the enormous plasticity of the teen brain make adolescence a time of great risk and great opportunity.”

So even though we sometimes look at our teens and think they have lost their marbles! What we really need to remember is that their teenage brains are especially equipped to take risks so that they can seize opportunities and build their futures.

What Can Parents Do About the Risks?

We have choices in parenting when it comes to our kids and risks. We put them in car seats, have them wear bike helmets, and teach them to look both ways before crossing the street. But by the time they are teenagers we are struggling to balance their true need to experiment and take risks with what we feel are safe choices. The truth is that if we wrap them in bubble wrap and stick them in a padded room, they might be safe, but they wouldn’t be able to take risks that involve opportunity. Opportunity is what we are ultimately seeking for our children. We want them to have opportunities to

• Find their passions
• Do well in school
• Build strong relationships
• Build their faith
• Contribute to society

So we teach our children to run and grab hold of opportunities – and that means to teach them to take risks. It is frightening. Just last week an area teen died while duck hunting. I say an extra prayer every time my daughter drives away from home. But if I don’t allow them the opportunity to take risks, I don’t allow them the opportunity to grow, which is what I desperately want for them.

In the time it took for me to write this article, I received a text message from my husband: a priceless picture of my teenage son with his first buck. My son is spending invaluable time with his father, bonding over a family hunting tradition, and learning to be responsible when it comes to firearms. I never thought I would be quite so happy to send my child out with a gun and then see a picture of a dead deer in the back of the truck, but I know it is the opportunity and goal for which my son has been working. I know he is building relationships and learning skills that will help him seek and find new opportunities.

Some days I long for bubble wrap, but it is also good to know that teens are hardwired for risks, and that risks mean opportunity. Carpe diem. And then keep the bubble wrap in the closet for the other days.

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/6acaJYf4PHg/

Sanity Savers with Printable Charts

Tags: behavior charts, chore charts, goal setting, printable charts, printables, setting goals

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For Chores, Behaviors, Goal Setting, and More

Have you ever asked your child to brush his teeth for the 11th time in one night? Or watched him flounder when he was trying to reach a goal before he even really started? A great tool for behavior modification and goal setting can be charts – chore charts, behavior modification charts, and even personal goal charts.

If you’ve heard of charts, wanted to try charts, or are not even sure where to begin, try some of these basics (or use the blank templates to create your own).

Road to Success – If your child is trying to set and achieve a goal, give her this visual aid chart that gives her milestone markers to help her travel her road to success and reach her goal (the instructions are on the printable pages).

Keeping on Track – Stay on track! Get back on track! Have these mantras every crossed your lips as you plead with your child to quit getting off track!? Use this simple chart for an activity in which your child struggles. Maybe your son has a very hard time staying on track in the morning eating breakfast. Talk with your child and take a look at the simple chart together (2 are included on each page – you can just cut them apart or leave them as is and use them with more than one child or for 2 different activities). Clearly tell your child what it will take to put an “X” on the train track square to show he is making progress. Maybe that means that for every morning when he eats breakfast without running away from the table to play he gets an “X” on the track. Make it a fun challenge to help keep him on track.

3 Thankful Thoughts – I love Thanksgiving and this time of year. Use this printable to help highlight behaviors you value – gratefulness and appreciation. At the end of every day, maybe at dinner or bedtime, sit with your kids and fill in 1 rectangle for each thing that makes them thankful. You can decide as a group or all have individual pages.

Responsibility Chart – You can use this chore chart with older kids to keep track of the busy school days of the week. Teach your kids to monitor themselves in categories such as homework and chores, but also being helpful to others.

• There is also a blank responsibility chart so you can print and add your own goals with your kids.

Daily Reminders for Little Ones – I used to use charts like this to help my little ones take charge of their own basic skills – brushing teeth, making their beds, and helping around the house.

• This version is for little ones who help take care of the pets.

Chore Charts for Kids (blank) – Print and make your own chart with goals that work for you and your family.

When you use chore charts and behavior modification charts, make sure that you do your part to set your child up for success – and you’ll be setting your whole family up for success!

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/QSobS4Kw3wk/

More Writing Printables

Tags: books, education, free printable, lesson plans, printable, printables, words, writing

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To Get Your Kids Excited about Words

I love writing – but I’m ready to accept the fact that not everyone does. However, I’m not ready to resign myself to raising kids who don’t want to even try. This is why I’ve created some easy ways to get them, and any other kids, excited about writing. Well – OK – even if they aren’t excited, they might just not dislike it quite so much.

Dialogue Starters

This is an easy printable book your kids can use to practice writing the words that people say. Dialogue can be a tricky thing to master, and can be intimidating for beginning writers with all of those quotation marks and indentations every time a new speaker appears on the page. This PDF book has simple pictures and dialogue boxes or thought bubbles. Kids get to imagine what the characters might be thinking or saying. It is not an evolving story, so kids don’t have to worry about carrying a storyline throughout the book. These are just single pages where kids can get creative.

What it teaches:

• Getting inside the thoughts of the character – the basis for dialogue
• How to experiment with both internal and external dialogue (the thought bubbles can be used for what people are saying to themselves)
• The relationship between pictures and words

Pop-Up Poem Book

This one page template can be printed and used to create a visual poem that unfolds before your child’s eyes. Since poetry gives children the opportunity to experiment without penalties (unless you are having them follow rules for specific types of poetry), kids can just use one word per square of the pop-up book (the directions are included at the top of the page).

• If your kids are just emerging writers, you can use the template for them to write and illustrate simple three letter (perhaps rhyming) words – i.e. bat, hat, cat, rat.

Whether you are a lover or a hater when it comes to writing, help your child become a try-er with some of these activities.

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/D2GcgTzD7Fc/

Why Do We Have Schools?

Tags: education, education methods, Godin, public education, public school, school

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Have your kids ever asked, “But why do I have to go to school?”

This is in essence the same question that Seth Godin poses to us as adults in Stop Stealing Dreams. Godin is an avid believer that the modern education system was built to create products of the industrial age – compliant, productive, and processed members of society. He discusses how our children are trained to be consumers and are suffering from two natural inclinations:

If it is work our kids try to do less.

If it is art our kids try to find a way to do less.

By art Godin does not necessarily mean paintings and sculptures, but creatively using the brain – inventing.

So Godin asks us: What is school for?

As technology weaves its way into our classrooms, we are at an unprecedented crossroads in modern education. How will we use these new tools at our disposal? And what will education look like if we decide that the answer to Godin’s question isn’t about compliance or consumerism? I wholeheartedly agree with Godin that the rows of desks and formulated check-lists for treating children the same is not how we lead with innovation and it isn’t how we allow our children to become their own true selves.

8 Steps for Better Education

Godin lays out 8 major steps he believes need to be taken in order to turn education into more of an opportunity for kids to thrive on their own ideas and less of an environment where they learn to comply and fit in to predetermined groups.

1. Do homework during the day and listen to lectures at night. This new trend is actually being used at schools across the country (although at a minimum). Our foreign exchange student’s chemistry class is arranged this way, and his teacher said that this is an attempt to allow for more freedom during class time for kids to explore ideas instead of sit passively. Lectures with graphics are made available online by the teachers and assigned for the students to watch before class. Class time is then a period to ask questions and do experiments.

   The obvious drawback is that not every child has access to internet capabilities at home, therefore putting uneven pressure on them to find other sources. Another hurdle for teachers using this approach is that some students will simply not watch the videos if there is no tangible grade that can be earned directly from watching them.

2. Everything should be open book and open note because there is zero value in memorizing. While I can agree with the sentiment, this is not a practical blanket statement. When we send our kids out into the world there are certain things they need to have memorized – phone numbers, how to spell their names, etc. When we work, even at jobs we love, there are certain aspects that require memorization. I think that Godin would have made a stronger argument had he specified that technology is providing short-cuts so we need to make better decisions about what our kids really need to memorize, and what information is available at their fingertips.
3. Students should have access to any course, any time. Godin’s argument is that we should get rid of prerequisites and the formalized order that by which we insist children learn. We need to allow them the freedom to learn about topics as they are interested and motivated to do so. Technology allows access to courses and experts that we have never had before.
4. Provide precise, focused education and do away with mass education. This is one of my favorite points from Godin. Our kids aren’t all the same, so it does not make sense that we insist that they all learn in the same ways, at the same pace.
5. Get rid of multiple choice exams. Godin firmly believes that these were only created because they were easy to grade.
6. Measure experience instead of test scores. Here is another favorite of mine, but how do we transform the expectations of employers who have also been trained to look for test scores? I am starting small in my own home, providing as many experiences as possible so that at least my children will know what excites and interests them. Other education systems in the world value real world experience much more than the American system appears to do – it would be a valuable step to pursue systems where apprenticeships could be seen with higher value.
7. End compliance as an outcome. Again, this is a wonderful talking point, but only something that can realistically be achieved when the other points are addressed. If Godin’s goals are reached, then this one is a side-effect.
8. Put a priority on cooperation vs. isolation. Rarely in our adult lives, in the real world, are we isolated from the ideas and energies of others. Even I, as a writer (likely to be envisioned as a solo job) collaborate and cooperate with clients every day. Cooperative learning projects in schools can help teach the communication and cooperation skills necessary to succeed in relationships, education, and future careers.

Godin ends his presentation with three poignant tips:

• Transform teachers into coaches.
• Create lifelong learning goals (finish in-class working and have job experiences earlier in life).
• Do away with “famous colleges” that charge money at astronomical levels for educations that are not inanately more able to land kids dream jobs.

So I’ll end this writing the same way Godin ended his presentation – go invent something. Challenge children to invent something. Figure it out. Get the wheels turning. Learn by doing. Imagine the possibilities of where we will go when we give our children the freedom to really learn.

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/1YUp3LgdswM/

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Working through the Criticisms and Questions

The toughest job I’ll ever love – homeschooling. Not for the faint of heart. Not a decision to make lightly. And apparently, a decision that more and more families are making in the United States. I recently read an article with a statistic that shocked me about homeschooling – and I am a homeschooler – so not much surprises me.

The number of children who are in primary grade levels whose parents decide to homeschool them is growing 7 times faster than the rate of parents who are enrolling their children in public schools.

No wonder homeschooling has growing in popularity among families who choose this educational path by 75% in just the last 12 years. Suddenly homeschoolers don’t have to feel quite so alone.

Homeschooling is one of those things I never thought I would do. Then I had children and I realized that my vision of their lives far-surpassed what I wanted them to experience behind the walls of the same school building for 12 years. Plus – I was having way too much fun watching them thrive and seeing them grow at their own paces. I wasn’t ready to push their own interests aside when I received those sign-up sheets in the mail for preschool readiness. The interests and abilities of my kids don’t fit neatly inside 4 walls – maybe it was my claustrophobia – but I felt like I would be holding them in confinement instead of teaching them to go as far as they could.

Homeschooling is Hard

As wonderful as it is, homeschooling is hard. There have been days when the educational and life successes of my children has weighed so heavily on my mind and I wonder if I somehow forgot to teach someone to count by threes or how to identify prepositional phrases. These self-doubts weigh heavily enough. Then as homeschoolers we some days feel the added crush – from the in-laws, the neighbors, the clerk at the grocery store who wonders why you’re there with a full minivan at 9:30 a.m. on a Tuesday. That crush can sometimes make those challenging days of self-doubt squish you more than a minivan full of your own kids – plus their friends – all piled in for “park day”.

I used to memorize statistics of the benefits of homeschooling, armed and ready to tackle the critics and the questioners. Then I realized that in a way my family was a curiosity more than something people were criticizing. Sure – there are still those critics who feel perfectly justified telling me of the multiple ways my children (who are all thriving) will undoubtedly be ruined by homeschooling. But for the most part, people are curious and sometimes it just comes out awkwardly and uncomfortably for all of us. Which is why over the years I have tried to move from defense – relaying all of the positives about homeschooling, to humorous offense – having fun with my life and being proud of our decision to homeschool.

Top Questions Homeschoolers Hear Every Day

(and how to answer them graciously with a side of humor)

Are all of these kids yours?

My stretch-marks would confirm for you that, yes, these children are all mine. However, I don’t want to invade your personal space and comfort zones by showing you my mother-tattooed mid-section, so you’ll just have to take my word for it. My favorite one is the kid who brings me fresh coffee every morning (FYI – none of my kids bring me coffee in the morning so ergo I don’t have a favorite).

How can you stand spending so much time with your kids?

Before I know it there won’t be any choice and they’ll be off living their own dreams. Although, some days going to the bathroom without interruption would be ranked as a significant accomplishment. When I am older and greyer I will probably spend sad moments in the bathroom when no-one comes knocking, needing to know at precisely the moment I sit upon the porcelain throne what we are having for lunch, where he put his math book, and how many pieces of gum I guess he just fit into his mouth.

(This is the one question that actually bothers my children the most. They always remark about how sad it is to hear parents speaking of the relief they feel when fall rolls around and it is time to send the kids back to school.)

Do you work at a real job, too?

There is nothing more real than raising the next generation. I just don’t get paid to do it in cash or check – just love and fulfillment.

Or

According to my coffee mug I am a domestic engineer.

How long do you plan to do that?

Make plans and God laughs. We “plan” to do this until it doesn’t work. Right now it works. It has worked for more than 12 years. I’m less worried about how long I plan to do this than I am with how can I make this continue to work for our family as long as possible?

No school today?

Oh my gosh – we forgot!!! (smile)

or

We homeschool – every day is a school day. Poor kids don’t even get snow days or time off for parent/teacher conferences – that’s just me talking to myself – again.

Are you worried that your kids won’t be socialized?

If you mean socialization by spending 8 or more hours a day with loud and sometimes obnoxious teenagers who text and drive, speak rudely to adults, and worry more about what their 549 friends on Facebook think of them than what they think of themselves, then, hmmmm. Nope.

Full disclosure – I know that there are wonderful kids who attend public schools. Some of the best friends of my kids (gasp – my kids have friends!) get on the school bus every morning. I just don’t think that my kids would thrive most on the socialization that occurs when kids are in age-segregated groups in a socioeconomically flat environment where the classmates are from similar neighborhoods. Although some days I do dream of a day when I could seclude my kids away from the rest of the world like those fake visions of homeschoolers so that I wouldn’t have to get out of my lounge pants and remember which activity needed the snacks and which community education class needed the samples of pond scum – you do not want to be the mom who messes up those two things. Socialization – check.

If you homeschool – how do you handle all of those questions from curious people?

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/Qg_GySRO1aE/

Tools for Better Writing

Tags: education, homeschool, printable activities, printables, writing, writing skills

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Teaching Writing Skills to Kids

There are some frightening statistics about the abilities of students when it comes to writing. Even though writing is one of my passions, I know that it is not for everyone. However, it is also a needed skill in life – one that our kids can learn.

• 80% of high school seniors in the United States are not considered to be proficient writers.
• 20% of high school seniors in the United States are not considered to be basic writers.
• Girls tend to outscore boys on assessments of writing skills.
• It is estimated that American firms spend more than $3 billion each year as a result of writing deficiencies among employees.

So – with all of the research pointing to the fact that too many children, especially boys, are not acquiring sufficient writing skills, what can we do about it?

How Can We Help Our Kids Write Well?

We have to start earlier. We can’t wait until they are seniors in high school and then realize that they are not prepared for college courses or the expectations of their employers. As the mother of 4 children, 3 of them boys, I have seen firsthand how it can be more challenging to teach writing skills to some children. Writing is not a naturally occurring milestone – it needs to be woven into the activities in which children participate and it needs to become less of a chore and more of an extension of communication. Our children need to learn that writing (and not just LOL, IDK, or BRB) allows them to express themselves, helps them reach their goals, and is a tool they will need in their future.

Part of the challenge of teaching writing to children is that writing, unlike reading, can seem infinite. There are as many ways to write a paragraph about a monkey as there are words in your child’s vocabulary. This can overwhelm children and shut them down to the writing process before they ever even get started.

Printable Activities for Writing

Give tangible goals to your kids for writing. I use these tickets as a way to remind my children on what areas they need to focus. Each ticket has a short, limited amount of goals, appropriate to where they are with their writing skills.

Don’t ask for it all in one. If you’re a homeschool parent like me, you can do this more easily. If your student attends public or private school, consider talking with his or her teacher about the writing strategies used in class. Find out what methods are utilized, and gently suggest some of these ideas.

• Limit writing to writing – especially for struggling writers. When you start to add grades for penmanship, spelling, and an accompanying picture to the mix it just gets to be too much.
• Brainstorm with your child. Show him how to write down words that he associates with the topic. These words can then be “jumping off” points for sentences, and they help kids focus their ideas.
• Try to help your kids create visual maps of their writing. For boys especially the writing process is not concrete enough to let them feel secure. When my boys were younger I used imagery like these worksheets to help them Build Great Paragraphs.

How do you help your kids learn to write?

Article source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BetterParenting/~3/H9jJ1393PDw/