Create Family Teamwork Through Family Responsibilities
Teaching children responsibility isn’t always easy. But if you read my post yesterday you can see that not only are household chores and responsibilities good for kids, but the earlier we give them to our kids, the better. Even our preschoolers can handle basic responsibilities, and in fact, prosper because of them. Kids who are responsible for contributing to the overall well-being of the household tend to feel more connected to the family, have higher self-esteem, and acquire valuable life skills. The family that works together, stays together, and chore charts are just one way to teach family responsibilities and teamwork.
The Value of Chore Charts
Chore charts are versions of behavior charts, where children are able to tangibly record their accomplishments toward their goals. In our busy household we have used chore charts for many reasons and with good success. Chore charts reduce nagging and they save me from repeating the tasks to my children over and over. They know each day for what they are responsible so there are no surprises. Instead of asking one by one if each task has been accomplished, I can simply ask if the chart is completed for the day, or just look at it myself.
The kids are also motivated by the accomplishments of their siblings. When they see that their younger brother is finished with his responsibilities they want to have those same accomplishments. The core charts are behavior charts because they track and record the efforts put forth by our kids, in essence their participatory behaviors within the family. The chore charts are hung in a universal location, typically on the outside of the kids’ bathroom door (painter’s tape is great for hanging things on doors and walls without ruining the finishes).
It can be tempting to just do the tasks ourselves, especially when we are in a hurry or have particular ways we want things to be accomplished. However, allowing our kids to complete the tasks on their own with minimal guidance from us will encourage them to take ownership of the tasks and learn for themselves how to most efficiently accomplish the goals. You will only undermine them if you criticize their attempts or go and redo their tasks. If you really struggle with certain tasks being completed certain ways, save those tasks for yourself and give your children responsibilities that you can live with them completing in their own ways.
Easy Chore Charts and Behavior Charts to Make and Print
Chore charts and behavior charts for non-readers and readers are easy to make and they help even the youngest members of the family feel like they are contributing. When my kids were 3 and 4 and not quite reading I would use clip-art in conjunction with the written instructions and make charts like these. The symbols were easy to decipher and helped my non-readers to feel like they were just as capable as older siblings.
It is also a rule in our household that this chart is not the be-all, end-all list of household responsibilities. These are the basics of each day, and there will be other things the kids might be asked to do on any given day. Sometimes I add a row onto my chore charts just for positive attitudes so that when the kids do participate in the family with positive attitudes that can be recorded for each day. This is one of those components that really makes these chore chart more like behaviors charts.
Should I Pay for Chore Chart Results?
Even though chore charts is the common name used for these behavior charts, in our home we usually refer to them as “family responsibility charts” because that is what they really are. The word chore just seems to imply something tedious, and what I hope to be reiterating to my children is that the tasks on these charts are not ominous, but they are how we each participate and work together as a family.
For this reason (among others), we do not give allowances based on the completeness of the charts. Instead we just make it clear from the beginning that the tasks on the charts are necessary for the family to function well. I don’t get paid for doing laundry and my husband doesn’t get paid for snow-blowing. These are things that need to happen in order for our lives to work well. The reward for the kids is self-confidence they get from achieving their goals and participating in the family.
One of the other drawbacks of paying allowance for chores is that eventually as kids get older and more self-sufficient they will have other opportunities to earn money through baby-sitting, odd jobs, or even part-time jobs at the mall. If their motivation thus far has been to earn money, their need for your money from chart completions might not be a motivating factor anymore when money can be earned elsewhere.
If you feel you want to add an extra reward to the chart system consider things like family outings, family game nights, or a special purchase at the end of the month for the family. The stress should be on the reward for the family, as the household responsibilities should be done to better the entire family.
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